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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27855510">only the frozen ground shaking</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/killsometime/pseuds/killsometime'>killsometime</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>College AU, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Werewolf AU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 22:48:37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>14,315</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27855510</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/killsometime/pseuds/killsometime</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Johnny looks again, trying to take in the man’s features. He looks a lot like Jung Jaehyun.</p><p>Older now, of course. He’s grown up nicely, Johnny notes. He’s dressed like a city boy — boots too nice to hike in, and an expensive watch.</p><p>He remembers Jaehyun’s dimples, and his laugh. He remembers the way Jaehyun used to carefully style his hair for school.</p><p>The wind shifts and Johnny sniffs. He definitely doesn’t remember Jaehyun smelling like a wolf.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Suh Youngho | Johnny</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>231</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Coffee Dates Fest [1st Round]</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>only the frozen ground shaking</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for the following prompt: “werewolf au &amp; college au, in which one of them just got turned into a werewolf (to save his life). The other one, born werewolf who used to be his classmate in high school meet him again in college and notice him being different”</p><p>Title from the lyrics of the song “The Only (DJ Koze Remix) - Herbert”</p><p>For some autumnal indie/CKUA-ish songs to accompany your reading, I have some recs:</p><p>Neon Bible - Arcade Fire<br/>How My Heart Behaves - Feist<br/>Team - Bon Iver<br/>Truth Nugget - Helena Deland<br/>Come Down - Bully<br/>Horseshoe Crabs - Hop Along<br/>Lefty - Title Fight<br/>We Were Wealth - Wye Oak<br/>Against the Moon - Iceage<br/>Recover - Bill Ryder-Jones<br/>Strangers to Ourselves - Modest Mouse<br/>Maggie - Sam Amidon<br/>Lost in the Dream - The War on Drugs<br/>The Runner - Kings of Leon</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Johnny’s favourite part of the day is coming outside to the smell of pine sap and fresh air first thing in the morning.</p><p>The trees are healthy here, and he can smell it in the air. The forest is happy. He and his pack take good care of the land and it’s reflected in the flourishing forest.</p><p>He sets his coffee down on the railing of the back porch and listens to the forest — the sparrows and the crows, the breeze, the soft footfalls of a white-tailed deer.</p><p>There’s a hint of chill in the air -- it’s grown the last two weeks of August and now it seems to have taken hold of the forest. Fall is coming soon, it says. </p><p>He allows himself one more calm moment before he takes his cooling coffee inside and gets ready for school.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The first day of the fall semester is bustling. Johnny is stuck in the same two buildings he's been in for the last two years and his classmates will be mostly the same -- there’s nothing new for him but he’s always loved the energy of the first day of school. Even if Clarendon College is a small school, it seems shiny and new to Johnny on the first day of school.</p><p>There’s someone looking at the building sign carefully. It must be a freshman, Johnny thinks, based on how lost they look.</p><p>Johnny pauses.</p><p>The man looks a lot like someone he went to high school with before he moved back to Fern Grove. He didn’t know Jaehyun particularly well -- he was three grades below Johnny, but even then he was good-looking in the way that even the girls in Johnny’s grade took notice.</p><p>Johnny looks again, trying to take in the man’s features. He looks a lot like Jung Jaehyun.</p><p>Older now, of course. He’s grown up nicely, Johnny notes. He’s dressed like a city boy — boots too nice to hike in, and an expensive watch.</p><p>He remembers Jaehyun’s dimples, and his laugh. He remembers the way Jaehyun used to carefully style his hair.</p><p>The wind shifts and Johnny sniffs. He definitely doesn’t remember Jaehyun smelling like an omega wolf.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny feels strangely unsettled and uneasy for the rest of the day. He goes to his three classes, and drives home right away instead of lingering on campus to get started on his readings for Korean history. </p><p>When he gets home, he leaves his backpack on the floor of the living room, strips down, and shifts. Immediately he feels more settled. His skin feels like it fits better on his body and his thoughts don’t seem as disjointed.</p><p>He starts off in a gentle lope, and begins running eventually. If the air smells good as a human, it smells even better as a wolf. </p><p>He thinks about his first day of school, and invariably ends up thinking about the man he thought could be Jaehyun. It’s been years since he moved away from Cunningham and back to Fern Grove. </p><p>Fern Grove is so small, and Clarendon College is such a tiny college that it seems pretty outrageous to think that Jaehyun would somehow find his way here. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Friday of that same week Johnny is getting out of his truck when he sees the same man on the pathway in front of the Classics Building. Johnny stills. His curiosity gets the better of him. </p><p>“Jaehyun?” Johnny calls out, closing his truck door and slinging his backpack over his shoulder. “Jung Jaehyun?”</p><p>The man turns to look at him, surprise evident in his face. </p><p>Now that Johnny is close enough he can see that it’s certainly Jaehyun, and he certainly is a wolf.</p><p>“Johnny Suh?” Jaehyun asks, almost hesitantly. Johnny is surprised that Jaehyun knows his name. They spoke probably twice in Johnny’s time in Cunningham.</p><p>“Yeah! Hey!” Johnny replies with a smile. “Crazy seeing you here. Are you a student?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Jaehyun answers. “It’s my first year. I didn’t know you went here.” Jaehyun says.</p><p>“This is my hometown. I moved back here for the last year of high school, and I guess I just ended up sticking around.”</p><p>“I see,” Jaehyun says. He seems nervous.</p><p>“Do you want to grab coffee or something sometime?” Johnny asks. “We can catch up.”</p><p>“Yeah, okay,” Jaehyun agrees. </p><p>“And you can tell me how you managed to hide being a wolf from me,” Johnny says with a joking smile. </p><p>“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jaehyun says tensely. He looks like he’s about to bolt.</p><p>“Uh, you being a wolf?”</p><p>“You can’t tell anyone,” Jaehyun says quickly. His scent smells panicked. “Please.”</p><p>“Uh, why would I?” Johnny asks. “Other wolves can just smell you and know.”</p><p>Jaehyun goes very still. The panic in his scent intensifies.</p><p>“Of course they can,” he mutters. “Look, I have class right now. I should go,” he adds curtly, and takes off.</p><p>Johnny stares after him. He doesn't understand what just happened. He doesn't know why Jaehyun would ask him not to tell anyone that he's a wolf. Most of all, he doesn’t understand why Jaehyun smelled so frightened. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun is avoiding him. That much is clear. </p><p>But Clarendon is small. They might have classes in different buildings but there’s only so many coffee shops and places to eat and study. Plus Johnny can always smell Jaehyun before he can see him. He’s the only other wolf on campus, and Jaehyun always smells frightened. As an alpha, Johnny is more attuned to the smell of fear than other wolves.  It bothers him, it means that he’s not doing a good job taking care of somebody.</p><p>His instincts are screaming for him to make things right between him and Jaehyun. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny is in the stacks of the library later that week looking for a book for one of his research papers. He’s so focussed on finding the call number that he isn’t paying attention to his surroundings. </p><p>This is how he runs into Jaehyun in the stacks of the library. Normally he’s attuned to scents, but the scent of paper is strong and he misses Jaehyun’s pleasant scent.</p><p>“Oh,” Jaehyun says, his eyes wide. </p><p>“Jaehyun, wait!” Johnny says as Jaehyun is turning to flee. </p><p>“I feel like we got off on the wrong foot,” Johnny says. “And I wanted to apologize for that. I’m sorry.”</p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t reply. </p><p>“I’m not trying to hurt you, or shame you,” Johnny says. “I just… wolves stick together. If you ever need any help finding something or need a car for groceries, I’d be happy to help you out.”</p><p>“Don’t call me that,” Jaehyun interrupts angrily, staring down at his feet.</p><p>“How can I not? It’s what we are,” Johnny says. He’s confused by Jaehyun. “Where’s your pack? There weren't any packs in Cunningham. ”</p><p>“Pack?” Jaehyun asks. “Backpack?”</p><p>“Your wolf pack,” Johnny clarifies.</p><p>“I don’t understand,” Jaehyun says. “I don’t have a pack or whatever.”</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“I only got turned into a wolf six months ago,” Jaehyun says. Johnny blinks in shock. “You’re the first wolf I’ve met.”</p><p>“You… What?” Johnny asks. That’s the last thing he’d expected to hear.</p><p>“I got turned six months ago,” Jaehyun repeats.</p><p>“You’re kidding.”</p><p>“I really wish I was,” Jaehyun says. His mouth twists into a frown.</p><p>“How did you get turned? That’s incredibly rare,” Johnny blurts out, before he can stop himself.</p><p>“Is it?” Jaehyun asks. His anger subsides for a moment, and Johnny gets a glimpse into just how confused Jaehyun is. </p><p>“Yeah,” he answers. “Most wolves are born.”</p><p>“I don’t… I don’t know,” Jaehyun says quietly. “I don’t know anything about being a wolf.”</p><p>His scent smells sad now, and lonely. It takes Johnny a moment to recognize it -- wolves are hardly ever lonely, so it isn’t a familiar scent. Wolves are pack animals -- they thrive in a pack. </p><p>“I can answer any questions you might have,” Johnny says quickly. “Or I can just… not talk to you. It’s fine.”</p><p>“I don’t know what I want, if I’m being completely honest,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“That’s okay,” Johnny replies. “I’ll leave you be then. I didn’t mean to disturb you.”</p><p>This time, he’s the one to leave first. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The next day Johnny ends up behind Jaehyun in line for a coffee. At first he contemplates pretending that he doesn’t see Jaehyun, but he isn’t sure what good that will do. </p><p>"I swear this is entirely accidental," Johnny says. Jaehyun quirks a smile.</p><p>"You smell like you're being honest," Jaehyun says. “Wait, can I smell that?” </p><p>“You can,” Johnny confirms. “At least you should be able to.” </p><p>Jaehyun is next in line for the cashier, so their conversation is halted for a moment while they order. Johnny pays for his coffee and Jaehyun is waiting for his breakfast sandwich to be heated up.</p><p>“Wolves stick together,” Johnny says then, even though he can smell Jaehyun’s anxiety. “If you don’t have anyone else, you have me, do you know that?”</p><p>“You hardly know me,” Jaehyun says.</p><p>“I don’t care,” Johnny says, staring right at Jaehyun. “You don’t have a pack, and you just moved to Fern Grove. If you need anything please let me know.”</p><p>Jaehyun sighs. </p><p>“I’m good, thank you.” </p><p>“Okay. Just let me know.”</p><p>Jaehyun bites his lip. His scent doesn’t smell as full of fear as it once did. Johnny smiles.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t explicitly agree to anything, but he stops running away from Johnny when they cross paths on campus. And when Johnny takes a seat at the table in the library where Jaehyun is studying, Jaeyun doesn’t protest. Johnny takes it as a victory. </p><p>They don’t talk about anything related to wolves. They don’t talk much about anything. They just sit together sometimes. Jaehyun’s scent transitions from being tense and anxious to something a little more relaxed. </p><p>Johnny thinks about the Jaehyun he knew of in high school. That Jaehyun was boisterous and fun, this Jaehyun is quiet and subdued. He'd think that they were entirely different people if he didn't know otherwise.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny and Jaehyun are sitting in the courtyard enjoying the last of the summer sun. Johnny is working on a paper on court life for his Korean history class while Jaehyun types up some discussion posts. </p><p>“Can I ask you something?” Johnny asks. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. But it’s just… How did you get turned?”</p><p>“Into a wolf?” Jaehyun asks. Johnny nods. </p><p>“I can tell you,” Jaehyun says. “It was in March. It was an accident mostly. I think. I was out for a run before school one morning when I got attacked by a wolf," Jaehyun says. Johnny sucks in a breath. </p><p>"Oh my god," he says. There's no reason for a wolf to attack a human like that, unless they were feral. </p><p>"Yeah. She seemed off. Like something was wrong. She was foaming at the mouth when she bit me on the leg. It hurt so bad. I was just stuck lying on this path, waiting to die."</p><p>"You don't have to tell me anything else if you don't want to," Johnny says, swallowing thickly. "This must be hard." </p><p>"It's okay," Jaehyun says. "I haven't... told anyone else."</p><p>"You haven't told anybody what happened?" Johnny asks. Jaehyun shakes his head. </p><p>"Everybody thought I missed a day of school, and then I was there the next day, like nothing happened. I didn't know what to say, it's not like anybody would believe me. Werewolves aren't supposed to be real. Besides, I was one of the popular kids. Everyone was more worried about college parties than me. I haven’t even told my parents.”</p><p>“So you’re telling me that you’ve been dealing with it all alone?” Johnny asks, horrified.</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Holy shit Jaehyun. That must’ve been really hard.”</p><p>“I guess,” Jaehyun mumbles. “I don’t know.” </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Johnny says. </p><p>“For what? You had nothing to do with it,” Jaehyun replies. </p><p>“I’m still sorry that you had to bear that alone without anyone to talk to.”</p><p>Jaehyun hums. There’s a pause. </p><p>“So how did you end up here? In Fern Grove?” Johnny asks, hoping that Jaehyun is still willing to talk to him. </p><p>“I got accepted to some bigger schools, but I thought that there would be no way I’d run into any other wolves here. That I could just be normal and have a quiet life here,” Jaehyun says, wringing his hands together. </p><p>Johnny can’t help but feel a little offended. There’s nothing abnormal about being a wolf. </p><p>“I see,” he says. “Well. My whole pack is here.”</p><p>“There’s more of you?” Jaehyun asks. Johnny nods. “I see.”</p><p>“You actually probably have less of a chance of running into wolves in a big city.” </p><p>“Oh,” Jaehyun says in a disappointed voice. </p><p>“It’s okay. You didn’t know.”</p><p>Jaehyun's chest sags slightly, like something has been released from within him. Johnny doesn’t know how to feel. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny goes for a run when he gets home that night. He can’t imagine going through what Jaehyun did. His chest aches. Wolves are supposed to be born and raised in packs -- they aren’t meant to struggle alone. </p><p>It upsets him as a wolf, and it upsets him even more as an alpha to think that any wolf would have to go through that pain. And Jaehyun is so clearly affected by it -- he’s shy and meek, and Johnny’s wolf hates it. </p><p>But he doesn’t know what to do. Jaehyun is skittish, that much is clear. Johnny wants to be supportive and helpful but he doesn’t want to scare away Jaehyun. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny knows that Jaehyun doesn’t have any classes on Tuesday afternoons -- he’s seen him studying in a cafe a few times during that time slot. </p><p>So he takes a chance. </p><p>“Do you want to come over to my place on Tuesday to do some homework? I’ll even provide dinner,” he says with a smile that he hopes isn’t overly friendly.  </p><p>Jaehyun considers it for a moment. </p><p>“Are you sure? That seems like a lot of work for you,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“It’s not. I really don’t mind,” Johnny replies quickly.  </p><p>“I… Okay,” Jaehyun says, and relief courses through Johnny’s body. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny goes to the grocery store on Monday after class for the ingredients to make short rib pot pie, and tells himself that he’s putting effort into the meal for fun, not to impress Jaehyun. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>He waits for Jaehyun outside the classics building after noon-hour classes.</p><p>“Hey,” Johnny says. </p><p>“Hey,” Jaehyun greets back. </p><p>Johnny leads them to his truck. His house is a forty-five minute drive away from campus on winding forest roads. The leaves are starting to turn on a few of the aspens-- flashes of bright red showing through the pines and spruces.</p><p>“This is such a long drive from school,” Jaehyun says as he looks out the window.</p><p>“It’s not so bad,” Johnny replies. “Well, in the winter it can be bad,” he amends. </p><p>“It must be nice to live off-campus though. I’ve only been at Clarendon for a few weeks and I already feel cooped up on campus,” Jaehyun says with a laugh. Johnny hums. </p><p>“I never even thought to live on campus. I like being in the forest too much,” he answers. “We’re here!” </p><p>“Wow,” Jaehyun says, staring up at Johnny’s house. “This is nice.”</p><p>“I know,” Johnny replies with a smile. “My parents had it re-done before I moved in.”</p><p>Jaehyun lets out an appreciative whistle. Johnny knows how fortunate he is to have a beautiful house nestled into the edge of the forest.</p><p>“You live alone?” Jaehyun asks. Johnny nods.</p><p>“I’m a pack alpha so it’s pretty normal to have my own place. There’s always pack members over though, so I don’t really live alone.”</p><p>“I see,” Jaehyun says.</p><p>Surprisingly, there isn’t anyone home. Johnny doesn’t know whether to be grateful or not. He wants Jaehyun to meet the pack, but he also doesn’t want them to scare Jaehyun away. </p><p>Johnny makes a pot of coffee for them and they settle at the kitchen table with their homework.</p><p>It’s the strangest thing but his wolf is almost purring at having Jaehyun in his house. They’re not even doing anything -- they’re just doing homework. He’s never been a particularly possessive wolf but he finds himself enjoying Jaehyun in his territory.</p><p>At five thirty he puts the pie in the oven and Donghyuck and Mark burst in the door, arguing like always.</p><p>“Oh!” Mark says, his eyes wide staring at Jaehyun. “We didn’t know you had someone over and-”</p><p>“Mark,” Johnny interrupts, “it’s fine.”</p><p>“You don’t know any wolves other than this,” Donghyuck says. “Who is this?” Johnny sighs at Donghyuck’s rudeness. </p><p>“Mark, Donghyuck, this is my friend Jaehyun. Jaehyun this is Mark and Donghyuck,” Johnny says.</p><p>“Hello!” Mark says brightly. </p><p>“Hello,” Jaehyun says back shyly.</p><p>“Hello,” Donghyuck says in a more subdued voice. “We’ll leave you to your date Johnny.” </p><p>“It’s not a date,” Johnny corrects, his cheeks turning pink. He casts a quick look at Jaehyun but Jaehyun isn’t reacting to Donghyuck’s jab. </p><p>“Oh, soon to be- ouch Mark!” Donghyuck says, and smacks Mark on the arm after Mark digs his nails into Donghyuck’s thigh. </p><p>“Donghyuck, Mark, can you please not fight?” Johnny asks. </p><p>“No,” they answer in unison. Jaehyun stifles a laugh. </p><p>“We’ll come back later. Bye Johnny,” Mark says. Donghyuck gives a half-wave.</p><p>“They’re wolves too, right?” Jaehyun asks once they’ve left. Johnny nods. “They smell different than you.”</p><p>“They’re betas. Most of the pack is,” he says. Jaehyun nods.</p><p>“Oh,” Jaehyun replies. </p><p>“I guess this must be weird for you, especially if you’ve never met any wolves before.”</p><p>“A little bit,” Jaehyun admits. </p><p>Just then, the sound of the front door slamming open travels through to the kitchen. </p><p>“I brought food!” Doyoung yells from the front hallway.</p><p>“Dinner is already in the oven,” Johnny says. “Stop yelling, we have a guest.” </p><p>Doyoung stops in the doorway of the kitchen and sees Jaehyun. Jungwoo hovers behind him, eyes wide.</p><p>“A guest? Oh! Hello!” Doyoung says. “I’m Doyoung.” </p><p>“I’m Jaehyun,” Jaehyun says, a little more confidently than his first introduction to Mark and Donghyuck.</p><p>“I’m Jungwoo,” Jungwoo says. “It’s nice to meet you. Johnny doesn’t usually bring people over.” </p><p>Johnny doesn’t miss the look that Doyoung and Jungwoo share. </p><p>“We’re doing some homework,” Johnny says. </p><p>“Oh! You met at school! Clarendon doesn’t have any other wolves except for Johnny,” Doyoung says. </p><p>“And me now,” Jaehyun adds. </p><p>“Mhmm,” Jungwoo hums. “Well. We’ll leave you to focus. Leave some pie leftovers for us!” He drags Doyoung out of the kitchen with him and Johnny can hear them slam the front door open as they leave.</p><p>“Is it always like this?” Jaehyun asks Johnny.</p><p>“What? Crazy?” Johnny asks and Jaehyun nods. “Pretty much.”</p><p>“You weren’t joking about people being over often though.” </p><p>“Not at all,” Johnny says with a laugh. “I swear it’s worse than if I lived with them because they always show up unannounced.”</p><p>They finish their work and eat dinner in comfortable silence.</p><p>“I should get home before it’s too late,” Jaehyun says as night starts to fall. </p><p>“Of course. Do you want to take leftovers with you?” </p><p>“Oh, I’m okay. I have a mealplan. Thank you though,” Jaehyun answers. </p><p>Jungwoo and Doyoung are sitting on the front porch looking at something on Jungwoo’s phone. They wave to Jaehyun and Johnny, and Jaehyun waves back.</p><p>“Can I ask you something?” Jaehyun asks him on the drive home.</p><p>“Of course,” Johnny answers. </p><p>"What does it mean that you're a pack alpha?" Jaehyun asks. Johnny looks at him curiously. </p><p>"It's kind of hard to explain. It's a feeling I have. I need to take care of my pack."</p><p>"Take care of them?"</p><p>"Make sure that they're fed and taken care of and protected." </p><p>"Oh," Jaehyun says. "So you take care of your whole pack?"</p><p>"Not quite. There are a few pack alphas, and we all take care of the pack together."</p><p>"Oh okay. Who takes care of you then?” Jaehyun asks. </p><p>Johnny’s eyes meet Jaehyun’s. </p><p>“My pack does, I guess. Until I meet the person I choose to mate.”</p><p>“Mate?” Jaehyun repeats with a laugh. “That sounds so… animalistic.” </p><p>“I suppose it does. Wolves mate for life.”</p><p>“So you haven’t met anybody you want to mate yet?” Jaehyun asks. Johnny shakes his head. </p><p>“No. I’m young though. I have lots of time.”</p><p>“Would you mate with a human or do you have to mate with a wolf?” </p><p>Johnny pauses to think about that question for a moment. He’s never thought about it. He grew up surrounded by wolves, except for when he moved to Cunningham. </p><p>It would be easier to mate a wolf certainly, but Johnny has never thought of himself as a wolf elitist. He’s dated humans. </p><p>“I could mate either. It doesn’t really matter. And our pack doesn’t care about those sorts of things.”</p><p>“Wait… Do I have to find a mate?” Jaehyun asks.</p><p>“If you want to,” Johnny answers. “But Jaehyun -- you’re young and you only just became a wolf. One step at a time. You really don’t need to worry about that.”</p><p>“Right.”</p><p>There’s a long lull in the conversation. Johnny feels some tension coming from Jaehyun. </p><p>“Sorry to make you drive for so long,” Jaehyun says as they get closer to Fern Grove.  </p><p>“I don’t mind. Driving helps to clear my head.”</p><p>“Thank you for today,” Jaehyun says then. His scent seems a little sad. “It was nice to meet your pack and see your house. And dinner was good too.”</p><p>“You’re welcome,” Johnny replies warmly. “I told you that wolves stick together.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>He finds the whole pack waiting for him in the living room when he gets home.</p><p>“Hey loverboy, where’s Jaehyun?” Jungwoo asks. </p><p>“At his dorm,” Johnny answers. “Don’t be gross.”</p><p>“So that’s who you’ve been smelling of,” Taeyong says. Johnny sighs. </p><p>“Johnny,” Doyoung says in a delighted voice. “You like him!” </p><p>“No I don’t,” Johnny says. “He’s my friend. It’s not like that at all.”</p><p>“You sure looked cozy,” Donghyuck says with a grin. “Study date plus you made something fancy for dinner.”</p><p>“He’s my friend!” </p><p>“He’s a very pretty omega wolf,” Yuta says. </p><p>“You didn’t even see him,” Johnny replies. </p><p>“I sent him a photo,” Doyoung says. Johnny smacks a hand against his forehead. </p><p>“You all need to mind your business,” he says. </p><p>“Our business isn’t as interesting as yours,” Mark says. </p><p>“Where did he come from?” Taeyong asks. “Most packs don’t ever send anyone to college here.”</p><p>Johnny feels his expression shift. </p><p>“About that,” he says. “Jaehyun doesn’t have a pack.” </p><p>Everyone reacts -- Mark’s mouth falls open, Doyoung looks concerned, and Donghyuck looks outright upset. </p><p>“What?” Yuta asks. “What do you mean he doesn’t have a pack?” </p><p>“He was turned six months ago,” Johnny explains. “By a feral wolf.”</p><p>Taeyong sucks in a breath. </p><p>“Oh my god,” Taeyong says. “Poor guy. That’s awful.”</p><p>“I know,” Johnny says. “So I’m trying to make friends with him. He doesn’t seem to be very happy.” </p><p>Doyoung pats Johnny on the arm reassuringly. </p><p>“You’re doing the right thing. I’m sorry we were making fun of you,” he says.</p><p>“He’s still a pretty omega,” Yuta says. “But yeah. What Doyoung said.”</p><p>“Do you need any help?” Mark asks. </p><p>“I don’t want to scare him off,” Johnny admits. “But thank you.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The larches start turning golden at the end of September. Johnny loves this time of year, when the air is cool at night but warm in the day. University gets more intense, but Johnny doesn’t mind. His days are simple -- school, pack, cooking, and Jaehyun. </p><p>He sees Jaehyun just about every weekday, if even just briefly. They continue studying together, and his packmates continue to ask Johnny suggestive questions about Jaehyun. Johnny rolls his eyes. He truly doesn’t feel like that about Jaehyun. He knows that Jaehyun is attractive, but he’s also young and vulnerable. It would be like breaking Jaehyun’s trust to like him. Johnny is the only other wolf Jaehyun knows. </p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t talk much about being a wolf. If Johnny brings it up in conversation, Jaehyun finds a way to change the topic. If Johnny mentions the pack or anything, Jaehyun smells sad. </p><p>So Johnny drops the subject. Jaehyun can be just a university friend, he tells himself even as his instincts protest. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>On a Friday afternoon in late September, Jaehyun shows up wearing dark-wash jeans and a fancy sweater that Johnny has never seen him wear. His hair is styled too. He looks as if he’s trying to impress somebody. He looks even more attractive than usual, Johnny’s hindbrain notes. </p><p>"Hot date?" he asks, more as a joke than anything.</p><p>"I guess," Jaehyun answers. “This girl in my Latin class asked me out.”</p><p>“Sounds good,” Johnny says. He doesn’t know why he feels strangely uncomfortable. Jaehyun is free to do as he pleases. “Good luck.”</p><p>“Thanks,” Jaehyun replies with a smile. “She’s super hot.” </p><p>Johnny can only nod.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“How was the date?” Johnny asks Jaehyun on Monday. </p><p>“Good,” Jaehyun says. The purple hickey on his neck serves as an agreement.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun smells frustrated and sad the next time Johnny sees him.</p><p>“Did something happen?” he carefully asks.</p><p>“I almost shifted when I was making out with my date,” Jaehyun says unhappily. “I just… I don’t know. I almost lost control and she was confused and I ran away.”</p><p>“Oh man,” Johnny says. “It happens. Being intimate can trigger your instincts without you even realizing.” </p><p>“It was awful!” Jaehyun bursts out. "I want to have a normal life, kissing normal girls. I don't want to be controlled by the fact that I'm a wolf!" His scent transforms to something angry and bitter. </p><p>"You don't have to be," Johnny says. “You’re a person who just happens to change into a wolf sometimes.”</p><p>“It’s ruining my life.” </p><p>“It’s okay,” Johnny says, trying to scent the air with calming pheromones. "You don't need to be ashamed of your wolf,” Johnny says. </p><p>Jaehyun goes stiff. Johnny realizes that he’s right, that Jaehyun is ashamed of being a wolf. Something ugly twists in Johnny’s chest.</p><p>“Why shouldn’t I be ashamed of being a monster?” Jaehyun practically sneers. Johnny feels his instincts rear. </p><p>“Is that what you think of me? That I’m a monster? ” he asks. “Are you ashamed of me? Are you ashamed to know me?”</p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t answer. That tells Johnny more than enough.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“You smell sad,” Donghyuck says that night when he sees Johnny. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Now it’s Johnny’s turn to go out of his way to avoid talking to Jaehyun</p><p>Johnny still sees Jaehyun around campus -- it's impossible for them to completely avoid each other, but he doesn’t want to talk to Jaehyun.</p><p>He’s hurt that he trusted somebody enough to meet the pack who was ashamed to know them.</p><p>But even so, he inexplicably misses Jaehyun. He shouldn’t but he does.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>He’s surprised to find Jaehyun waiting for him outside his Research Methods classroom after a week of silence.</p><p>“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Jaehyun asks him. There’s a sense of quiet confidence about him.</p><p> Johnny thinks about making up some kind of excuse to get out of talking to Jaehyun, but he knows that won’t do him any good. He forces himself to take a deep breath. </p><p>“Yeah. Do you want to go get a coffee or something?”</p><p>“Sure. My treat,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>They end up at the coffee shop in the basement of the History building. Jaehyun buys Johnny a latte and they sit down in a corner booth. </p><p>“What’s up?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun sets his shoulders back. </p><p>“I need to say sorry,” Jaehyun says. “I was so rude to you.”</p><p>“Oh.” </p><p>“I haven’t been myself lately but that doesn’t excuse being badly behaved. I’m sorry for acting like such an asshole to you,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“I’m your friend, but I’m also an alpha of my pack,” Johnny says carefully. “Which means that I’m always going to pick them first. If you’re ashamed to know me, that’s fine but I have to take care of my pack.”</p><p>“I’m not,” Jaehyun blurts out. “Or at least I’m trying really hard not to be ashamed of you. You and your pack have been nothing but be kind to me when I didn’t even deserve it.”</p><p>Johnny goes still.</p><p>“I don’t want to be ashamed of being a wolf, but I can’t do that if I ignore it or pretend it doesn’t exist. If I ignore you or pretend you don’t exist,” Jaehyun continues. His breathing seems oddly strained. “The truth is that I’m afraid of myself. Of my… wolf.”</p><p>“You don’t need to be afraid of your wolf,” Johnny says. “It’s a blessing.”</p><p>“It doesn’t feel like a blessing,” Jaehyun replies. “I’m struggling. I’m really struggling with it.” </p><p>“I could help you become less afraid. If that’s something you want,” Johnny says carefully.</p><p>“I don’t know if that’s possible,” Jaehyun says sadly, and Johnny feels any anger he’d previously felt disappears. </p><p>“I don’t know either,” he says. “But if you ever want to try, you know where I am.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>They’re sitting in the library studying when Jaehyun looks up from his work and looks at Johnny.</p><p>“Hey Johnny?” he asks shyly.</p><p>“Yeah?” Johnny answers.</p><p>"If you were serious about helping me get more comfortable with my wolf… I’d be interested in that,” Jaehyun says softly. </p><p>“Of course I am,” Johnny says, offering Jaehyun a small smile.</p><p>“I want to learn more about being a wolf. I want to get to know your pack better.”</p><p>For the first time since he’s met Jaehyun, Johnny can’t detect any fear or worry in Jaehyun’s scent.</p><p>“I’d love to help you. The pack would be happy to help you too.” </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny drives Jaehyun to his house on a grey Thursday afternoon. He made sure beforehand that no one from the pack would come over to bother them. </p><p>“Okay, what are we going to do?” Jaehyun asks when Johnny leads them into his backyard. </p><p>“You can shift right?” Johnny asks.</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Let’s see,” Johnny says.</p><p>“Right now?” Jaehyun asks. “Right here?”  </p><p>“No one will see,” Johnny replies. “I can turn around if you want.” </p><p>He’s lost any sense of impropriety around being naked but he can understand why Jaehyun would be nervous.</p><p>Johnny quickly comes to realize that being naked isn’t why Jaehyun seems so nervous.</p><p>It takes Jaehyun a long time to shift, like a pup learning how to shift. He shifts his weight and scrunches his forehead and it takes him almost fifteen minutes to shift.</p><p>And then when he does shift, Johnny winces. He’s never seen anyone shift like Jaehyun. The shift is too quick and awkward, more like ripping a band-aid off than shifting forms. Johnny can tell it hurts Jaehyun too, based on the noises Jaehyun makes while shifting.</p><p>Then, just as quickly as Jaehyun shifted into a wolf, he shifts back into a panting human. </p><p>“There,” Jaehyun says, breathing heavily. “See?” </p><p>He sounds defeated. He’s shaking and he reeks of upset and fear. Johnny can’t help himself -- he reaches out and hugs Jaehyun even though Jaehyun is naked. Jaehyun isn’t small by any stretch of the imagination, but he fits easily into Johnny’s arms anyways.</p><p>“I hate being a wolf,” Jaehyun says, his voice cracking. “I hate it!” His scent is sour with anger, sadness, and shame. Johnny never wants to smell it again. His instincts are on edge.</p><p>“It’s okay,” Johnny says, stroking Jaehyun’s hair softly. “Let it all out.”</p><p>Jaehyun sobs and sobs into Johnny’s chest. Johnny just holds him, feeling the way Jaehyun’s chest shakes against his.   </p><p>Finally, Jaehyun’s sobs taper off, and Johnny tugs him into the house. </p><p>“That’s enough for today,” Johnny declares. “You did great.” </p><p>“No I didn’t,” Jaehyun says with a sniffle. </p><p>“Are you hungry?” Johnny asks. “I’ll make us some dinner.”</p><p>“That’d be nice,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“Do you want to have a shower while I cook?” Johnny asks. “It might make you feel better.”</p><p>“Thanks Johnny,” Jaehyun answers, and gives Johnny a weak smile. It does something funny to Johnny’s heartrate.</p><p>He fetches some clothes and a towel for Jaehyun, and then busies himself making some pasta for dinner. </p><p>Jaehyun comes out of the bathroom half an hour later looking much perkier. He’s bundled up in a pair of Johnny’s sweatpants and a hoodie that Johnny thinks belongs to Jungwoo.</p><p>“Having a shower was a good suggestion,” he says. His eyes aren’t as swollen and he seems a little more relaxed. </p><p>“Good,” Johnny says. “Dinner is almost ready.”</p><p>They’re just sitting down for dinner when Doyoung walks into the kitchen. </p><p>Doyoung’s eyes are bulging out of his head when he sees Jaehyun. </p><p>“Hey,” Johnny greets.</p><p>“Uh, Johnny, you have a boy wearing your clothes,” Doyoung says. </p><p>“I had a shower,” Jaehyun provides. </p><p>“Uhhh,” Doyoung says. </p><p>“We were practicing shifting,” Johnny says. </p><p>“Oh,” Doyoung replies. He seems disappointed. </p><p>“Do you want dinner or did you just come here to be annoying?” Johnny asks. </p><p>“To be annoying, obviously,” Doyoung says. “I see I’ve had my desired effect.”</p><p>“You can stay if you want,” Jaehyun adds, and Doyoung looks at him. </p><p>“I’m… Yeah. Sure.” </p><p>Dinner is more quiet than Johnny might’ve expected. Jaehyun and Doyoung hit it off pretty easily. Doyoung is more toned down when Jungwoo isn’t there, and Johnny appreciates it. Jaehyun asks Doyoung about his role in the pack, and Doyoung asks Jaehyun questions about university. </p><p>“Doyoung seems nice,” Jaehyun says on the drive home. </p><p>“He is,” Johnny replies. “I’m sorry today was so stressful for you.”</p><p>“It’s okay,” Jaehyun says. “I won’t get any better at being a wolf if there isn’t stress.”</p><p>Johnny considers Jaehyun’s words for a moment. </p><p>“You don’t need to think about being a better wolf. There’s no such thing.”</p><p>Jaehyun is silent for the rest of the drive.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny decides to switch tactics the next time Jaehyun comes over. </p><p>Johnny strips off his shirt in the backyard. </p><p>“Wait, what are you doing?” Jaehyun asks. His scent spikes with concern. </p><p>“I’m shifting. I think we need to start small. Get you more comfortable around wolves.”</p><p>Jaehyun closes his eyes while Johnny strips down and shifts. Turning into his wolf form feels as natural as walking.</p><p>Johnny approaches Jaehyun carefully, crouching slightly so as to make himself look less intimidating. Jaehyun’s eyes are scrunched shut, as if he’s afraid to see Johnny.  </p><p>He licks Jaehyun’s hand and Jaehyun’s eyes fly open.</p><p>“Johnny?” Jaehyun asks. Johnny nods his head. </p><p>Jaehyun takes a step back. </p><p>Johnny lies down immediately, making himself small. He huffs out a breath. </p><p>“You look like a big dog,” Jaehyun says. Johnny yips a laugh. He licks Jaehyun’s hand again. </p><p>Jaehyun reaches out and pats him tentatively. </p><p>Johnny leans into the touch to indicate that it’s alright. </p><p>After a few moments, Johnny shifts back and dresses quickly in the cool air.  </p><p>“How come your shift is so controlled? It looks so easy,” Jaehyun says as Johnny buttons up his flannel.</p><p>“I’ve been doing it for a lot longer than you,” Johnny says. “And I also want to shift. I want it and it comes easy to me because I welcome it.”</p><p>Jaehyun twists his mouth unhappily.</p><p>“I want that,” Jaehyun says, “but I just don’t know how to.” </p><p>“Let me walk you through it,” Johnny says gently. </p><p>Johnny takes Jaehyun through the shifting process -- explaining each step of how he shifts. Jaehyun seems a little confused, but he listens intently. </p><p>“Do you get used to the pain?” Jaehyun asks at the end. </p><p>“Pain?” Johnny asks. “It shouldn’t hurt if you shift properly.”</p><p>Jaehyun sighs.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun comes over to Johnny’s house a few times a week -- they do homework and then Jaehyun will go practice shifting in the yard before dinner.</p><p>“Do you want me there with you?” Johnny asks him. </p><p>“I think I’m okay. I’ll yell if I need anything,” Jaehyun answers. “I think it’ll make me less nervous if I’m by myself.”</p><p>Johnny nods. He doesn’t know what about his presence would make Jaehyun nervous, but he wants to respect Jaehyun’s wishes. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>At first Jaehyun comes back into the house red in the face and smelling upset. Then, slowly, as the leaves start to fall off of the trees, Jaehyun grows more confident. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny’s paws crunch through the dead leaves as he walks through the autumn forest on a chilly Saturday morning. He thinks about young wolves, and how they grow up. They play, and they run together to bond and get more comfortable in their wolf form. They cuddle up together at night and go hunting for rabbits. He has fond memories of doing all those things as a pup. </p><p>But Jaehyun hasn’t ever done any of that. Perhaps, now that he’s had more practice shifting he can see the fun parts about being a wolf, and the rewards of having a pack.    </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“You seem to be much more comfortable shifting now,” Johnny says. </p><p>“I am,” Jaehyun replies. </p><p>“So I was thinking maybe you could try something.”</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>“Wolves like to play,” Johnny says. “It’s how we let off steam. It’s important for bonding.”</p><p>“You want me to play with you?”</p><p>“Actually, I thought you could play with the pack,” Johnny says, scratching the back of his neck. “They want to help you, and they’re probably more fun than me.”</p><p>“I could try,” Jaeyun says shyly. </p><p>“Only if you want to,” Johnny says quickly. </p><p>“I want to,” Jaehyun says. He sounds a little more confident. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The next time Jaehyun comes over, Jungwoo, Donghyuck, and Mark are waiting for him. </p><p>Johnny watches Jaehyun play with Donghyuck, Mark, and Jungwoo in the backyard. At first Jaehyun is cautious as the rest of them practically dogpile him, but he slowly grows more comfortable once he sees that nobody is going to hurt him.</p><p>Donghyuck nips at Jaehyun and Jaehyun is on-edge for a moment before he realizes that Donghyuck is just playing with him. Johnny laughs as Jaehyun chases Mark through the trees and Jungwoo chases after them. </p><p>Then Jaehyun comes over and tries to play with Johnny, practically bouncing to try to get Johnny to play.</p><p>“Hey, hey!” Johnny says with a laugh. Donghyuck brushes against Johnny’s legs and almost knocks him over. Jaehyun nudges Donghyuck as if to chide him. </p><p>Jaehyun huffs and Johnny laughs before reaching out to scratch underneath Jaehyun’s neck. Jaehyun leans into the touch.</p><p>“Good pup,” Johnny teases. Jaehyun huffs. “Come inside when you’re ready and I’ll get dinner going.”</p><p>Jaehyun nods and launches off after Mark. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“Was it fun?” Jungwoo asks Jaehyun excitedly once they’ve shifted back and dressed again. </p><p>“It was,” Jaehyun confirms. Jungwoo grins and hugs Jaehyun. Jaehyun is stiff for a moment and then relaxes. </p><p>“It wasn’t too much was it?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun shakes his head. </p><p>“You can come over and play with us any time!” Mark says. Jaehyun smiles. </p><p>“Thanks,” he says shyly.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“I like him,” Donghyuck declares when Jaehyun is in the bathroom. “Your boyfriend is cool Johnny.”</p><p>“He’s not my boyfriend.”</p><p>“He’s cool anyways,” Mark says.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>They settle into a comfortable routine — Jaehyun comes over a few times a week and the pack gets to know him.</p><p>Jaehyun even starts helping Johnny cook, saying that he can’t just keep eating all of Johnny’s food. So Johnny teaches him some basics of chopping and sautèing, and Jaehyun throws himself into practicing the same way he did with shifting. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun ends up staying late one early October evening after doing some homework with Johnny and running around the yard with Doyoung and Jungwoo. Johnny didn’t even keep track of the time.</p><p>“Oh shit,” Jaehyun says, looking down at his phone for the first time in hours. “It’s ten. That’s late. The road is going to be dark.” Johnny hums in agreement. There aren’t any streetlights on the road close to his house.</p><p>“I don’t mind driving you home,” Johnny says. “But you can also stay over if you want. I have more than enough rooms.”</p><p>“Are you sure? I don’t want to make you drive if you don’t have to.”</p><p>“Duh,” Johnny answers. “I’m surprised you haven’t stayed over sooner.”</p><p>“Are you?” Jungwoo asks in a teasing voice. Johnny and Doyoung send him dirty looks. Jaehyun doesn’t seem to notice. </p><p>He shows Jaehyun to the bedroom right across the hallway from his own. Doyoung and Jungwoo have already claimed the other rooms. </p><p>“It’s not much but it’ll do,” Johnny says.</p><p>“No this is great, thank you,” Jaehyun replies. There’s a cozy yellow quilt at the end of the bed and a skylight letting in soft moonlight.</p><p>“Let me get you some pajamas,” Johnny says. “We’re pretty close to the same size.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny wakes up in the middle of the night to a strange wailing noise. His heart starts pounding. </p><p>He throws open his door and looks around frantically. The noise is coming from Jaehyun’s room. Johnny barges in, he doesn’t even bother to knock. </p><p>Sure enough, Jaehyun is curled up in his bed whimpering and wailing. </p><p>"Jaehyun?" Johnny says quietly. Jaehyun's sounds grow louder. “Jaehyun?” </p><p>He sits on the bed and takes Jaehyun’s arm in his hand. </p><p>He shakes Jaehyun softly. </p><p>"No!" Jaehyun says, his eyes flying wide open. </p><p>"It's just me," Johnny says quietly. "Johnny." </p><p>His hair is stuck to his forehead with sweat, and he looks pale. </p><p>"You're okay," Johnny says. </p><p>"Did I wake you?" Jaehyun asks. </p><p>“No,” Johnny lies. </p><p>“I keep having nightmares about shifting,” Jaehyun says with a sigh. Johnny doesn’t stop himself -- he reaches out and strokes Jaehyun’s hair gently. </p><p>“I’m sorry to hear that,” Johnny says. “That must be scary.” </p><p>“Johnny… Could you stay until I fall asleep?” Jaehyun asks quietly.</p><p>“Of course,” Johnny answers. </p><p>“Thank you.” </p><p>“Any time,” Johnny says. </p><p>He stays there, stroking Jaehyun’s hair until Jaehyun’s breath evens out, </p><p>He doesn't ever want to see Jaehyun like this but he's simultaneously grateful that he's the one who gets to hold Jaehyun and pick up the pieces. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny wakes up the next day feeling settled. Jaehyun is just coming out of his room when Johnny gets up. </p><p>“Good morning,” Jaehyun says sleepily. Something funny flips inside Johnny’s chest. Jaehyun looks so soft in the morning. In Johnny’s pajamas, his hindbrain says. </p><p>“Good morning,” Johnny says back. The hems of Johnny’s pajama pants drag on the floor -- they’re just slightly too long for Jaehyun.</p><p>“Did you sleep well?”</p><p>“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Johnny asks in response. Jaehyun smiles. </p><p>He follows Jaehyun down to the kitchen. Jaehyun looks out the window while Johnny makes oatmeal for the two of them. </p><p>The tops of the trees deeper in the forest are covered in clouds. </p><p>“Okay, I’m starting to see the appeal of living out here,” Jaehyun says.</p><p>“Do you want to see the forest?”</p><p>Jaehyun blinks at him. </p><p>“Uh, I’m looking right at it.”</p><p>Johnny laughs. </p><p>“No. I mean really see it, the way it is. We’ll go for a run after breakfast.”</p><p>“I didn’t bring my running shoes though.”</p><p>“Uh.”</p><p>“Oh, you mean as wolves,” Jaehyun says, realization apparent on his face.</p><p>“Yes,” Johnny replies with a laugh. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>There are swirls of frost on the fallen leaves as they make their way deeper into the forest. Johnny can see the way the forest has transitioned towards winter now -- the hidden holes for small animals to spend a cozy winter, and the tracks of coyotes and foxes to scurry and try to catch the small animals. There aren’t any leaves on the trees anymore and the bare branches stretch towards the grey sky. It’s beautiful in an austere way, Johnny thinks. </p><p>They come to a stop in a clearing with a trickling waterfall -- not yet frozen over for the winter. There are birds chirping in the trees, and squirrels knocking pinecones onto the ground for their winter stores. It’s completely serene. Johnny looks over at Jaehyun and Jaehyun is looking around him with wonder in his eyes, even as a wolf.  Johnny lets himself admire Jaehyun’s wolf -- he’s just as pretty in this form, all tufts of white and caramel fur with amber eyes. Jaehyun’s wolf stands in stark contrast to Johnny’s black wolf. They look striking beside one another.</p><p>Suddenly there’s a soft hoot and Johnny turns to see a Great Horned Owl staring at them. Jaehyun’s mouth falls open. Johnny bows his head respectfully. It turns to look at Jaehyun as if to ask who the stranger is. </p><p>On their way back to Johnny’s house they pass voles and moose all starting their morning too. The world is alive around them.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>They settle in the living room with their laptops and mugs of coffee when they get back to the house.</p><p>Throughout the morning they’re interrupted several times. Yuta traipses in and bakes cookies, smelling up the house like chocolate chip. Taeyong brings a Tupperware of leftovers and stashes it in Johnny’s fridge. They both say hello to Jaehyun, clearly curious to see who the new wolf is. Mark and Donghyuck stop by too, and bother Jaehyun because he won’t play with them. </p><p>Jaehyun laughs at something Mark says, and Donghyuck rests his head on Jaehyun’s shoulder.</p><p>Johnny can’t help but smile at the sight. The atmosphere feels comfortable and warm.</p><p>Eventually, Mark and Donghyuck grow bored of bothering Jaehyun, and start to scent Yuta, cuddling up to him. If Johnny isn’t mistaken, Donghyuck falls asleep. </p><p>“What are they doing?” Jaehyun asks. “Smelling each other?” </p><p>Johnny laughs. He forgets how much Jaehyun doesn’t know.</p><p>“Sort of. They were scenting each other, which is a way wolves bond.”</p><p>“What does it feel like?”</p><p>“Do you trust me?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun nods. “Okay. I’ll scent you and you can see what it feels like. Can I see your neck?” </p><p>Jaehyun tilts his head to the side, completely baring his neck to Johnny. He’s submitting, Johnny’s instincts practically purr.</p><p>Johnny leans in and scents Jaehyun at his neck. Jaehyun smells nice -- like juniper and rosemary, and his neck is soft. Johnny hasn’t been close to an omega like this in a long time.</p><p>He hears Jaehyun inhale.</p><p>“It feels good,” Jaehyun says quietly.</p><p>“I know,” Johnny replies. “It feels good for me too.”</p><p>He’d linger for longer if he didn’t have Yuta’s curious eyes on him. With one last graze of his nose against Jaehyun’s scent gland, he pulls away. </p><p>“Pack bonding usually includes scenting, and so does bonding between mates or family,” he says, ignoring the way his voice trembles slightly. </p><p>“I see,” Jaehyun says. “It was nice.”</p><p>Johnny has to close his mouth before he does something stupid like offer to do it again. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The next full moon is starting to approach. Johnny wonders if Jaehyun has any plans for it. So, the next time Jaehyun is over at his house doing homework, he decides to ask.  </p><p>"Do you have any full moon plans?" Johnny asks. Jaehyun looks up at him with a confused look on his face. </p><p>"I don't even know when the next full moon is," Jaehyun replies. “I don’t really like full moons. They make me feel weird.”</p><p>“Full moons are the best time though,” Johnny says. </p><p>“I’ve only shifted during one full moon,” Jaehyun says. “I don’t like feeling out of control like that.”</p><p>“You shouldn’t feel out of control. You should feel closer to your wolf,” Johnny says with a frown. “We’ve always been taught to enjoy them. It’s like a holiday.” </p><p>“Hmm.” </p><p>Johnny pauses. He shouldn’t run with Jaehyun during the full moon. He shouldn’t. He’s an alpha. He needs to run with his pack.</p><p>“We could go running together. You and I. It’s better with another wolf, I swear,” he blurts out. Jaehyun blinks, clearly surprised by Johnny’s reply. </p><p>“You’d be okay with that?”</p><p>“Of course I am!” Johnny says. “It’s an important part of being a wolf.” </p><p>“Okay,” Jaehyun says, biting his bottom lip. “Sounds like a plan. Will any of the others come?” </p><p>“It’ll just be the two of us,” Johnny answers. </p><p>“Okay.” </p><p>"There's some stew leftover for dinner tonight," Johnny says. "And I thought I'd make some bread to go with it." </p><p>"Whew. Girls better watch out," Jaehyun replies with a smile. "You're pretty much husband material."</p><p>Johnny laughs awkwardly. He hasn’t ever needed to explicitly come out to anybody. His parents and his pack knew from when he was a kid.</p><p>"Well. I don't know about that," he says. "Husband material maybe. But it isn't girls that need to watch out." </p><p>He sees Jaehyun's fingers still over the keyboard of his laptop. </p><p>"Oh?"</p><p>"Yeah. I'm not really... into girls," Johnny says quietly. </p><p>"Let me re-phrase," Jaehyun says, looking right into Johnny's eyes. "Boys better watch out. You're pretty much husband material." </p><p>Johnny doesn't understand why his heartrate increases at Jaehyun’s words. </p><p>“But that works for you for dinner?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun nods. </p><p>“That sounds great Johnny,” he says. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The next full moon falls on the Thanksgiving weekend in the middle of October, so Johnny decides to invite Jaehyun over for Thanksgiving with the pack. It isn’t much -- just a big dinner with turkey and pumpkin pie, but he always enjoys having the pack all together and he wants Jaehyun to experience that too. </p><p>Taeil even comes home from university to visit for the full moon. Johnny is excited to see the other young pack alpha. </p><p>He’s so used to Taeil that he forgets that Jaehyun is a newly born omega wolf. </p><p>“Taeil, this is Jaehyun. Jaehyun, this is Taeil,” Johnny says happily. Jaehyun is practically hiding himself behind Johnny.  </p><p>“It’s nice to meet you,” Taeil says warmly. </p><p>“Nice to meet you too,” Jaehyun replies shyly.</p><p>Suddenly there’s a screeching noise, and Donghyuck comes streaking into the living room to throw himself at Taeil. </p><p>“I’m home, I’m home, yes,” Taeil says with a laugh. Donghyuck presses a wet kiss to Taeil’s cheek. </p><p>“You surprised me!” Donghyuck exclaims. </p><p>“I wanted to,” Taeil says warmly. “I missed you.” </p><p>Johnny turns away from the sight slightly. He feels as if he’s intruding. </p><p>Jaehyun squishes into Johnny, closer than he usually does. His scent is a little off.</p><p>“Are you okay?” Johnny asks quietly.</p><p>“Taeil is a strange beta,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“He isn’t a beta,” Johnny says with a laugh. “He’s an alpha, like me.”</p><p>“Oh,” Jaehyun replies. “Is that why I feel kinda out of sorts?”</p><p>“Your instincts?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun nods. “Meeting an unfamiliar alpha always feels like that.”</p><p>“I don’t like it,” Jaehyun says. He leans into Johnny’s neck. </p><p>“It’ll pass soon.”</p><p>“Do you mind?” Jaehyun asks, leaning closer to Johnny’s neck. It takes Johnny a moment to realize what he's asking -- to scent Johnny. It’s unusual for wolves who aren’t packmates to scent but Johnny is weak where Jaehun is concerned.</p><p>Jaehyun leans in and scents Johnny -- repeating what Johnny had done to him. Only this time, Johnny isn’t in control, and he finds himself enjoying having Jaehyun nosing at him. Scenting signifies trust and love. And Johnny is only an alpha with a gorgeous omega scenting him. </p><p>“Much better,” he says. The strange note in his scent has disappeared, and he smells relaxed and content. “I feel weird around Taeil. I don’t like it.”</p><p>“Huh?” Johnny asks. </p><p>“I don’t feel that way around you though,” Jaehyun says with a smile. Johnny’s heart thumps. </p><p>“What does it feel like?”</p><p>“It’s kind of uncomfortable. Around Taeil I feel sort of afraid. I don’t feel like that with you. I trust you. I know I can be myself around you."</p><p>“I’m glad,” Johnny says. His throat feels tight. “I’m really glad.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny goes outside to chop some more firewood before dinner and Jaehyun follows him.</p><p>He swears that he can feel Jaehyun’s eyes on him as he sets the log up onto the tree trunk and uses an axe to chop. </p><p>Jaehyun is silent while Johnny works. </p><p>"I wonder what it feels like to have an alpha," Jaehyun muses quietly as he helps Johnny to carry some of the firewood back into the house.  </p><p>"Before I presented I remember alphas felt like... older siblings I guess," Johnny says, recalling his childhood. </p><p>"I'm an only child," Jaehyun says thoughtfully. "I don't know what it feels like to have an older brother or sister."</p><p>"An older friend then?" </p><p>"Like you?" Jaehyun asks, his mouth quirking into a smile. </p><p>"I guess I'm both for you," Johnny replies with a laugh. Jaehyun stiffens. </p><p>"You aren't my alpha though," Jaehyun says quietly. </p><p>“No, I’m not,” Johnny says, plucking the heavy looking piece of wood from Jaehyun’s arms. </p><p>The note of happiness disappears from Jaehyun’s scent, and Johnny doesn’t know what that means. </p><p>Jaehyun shivers once they’re back inside. </p><p>“Cold?” Johnny asks.</p><p>“A little,” Jaehyun answers. “I’ll warm up soon though.”</p><p>“I’ll grab you something,” Johnny says and gets up before Jaehyun can protest. </p><p>He comes back with one of his sweatshirts and tosses it at Jaehyun’s head. </p><p>It’s a baggy fit when Jaehyun puts it on, but it suits him anyways. Best of all, when he focuses,  Johnny can smell their scents mixed together on Jaehyun.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun is visibly nervous on the night of the full moon. </p><p>“Are you okay?” Johnny asks when Jaehyun hardly touches his dinner. </p><p>“I’m nervous,” he answers. </p><p>“Do you trust me?” he asks Jaehyun. Jaehyun nods. “I’ll be there with you the whole time. You won’t be alone,” Johnny says. </p><p>“Okay,” Jaehyun says softly. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Nobody from the pack notices when Johnny and Jaehyun stay back at the house when everyone else is going out to run in the forest. </p><p>Johnny waits for Jaehyun to shift first. It’s an elegant and easy shift. If Johnny didn’t know any better, he’d think that Jaehyun was born a wolf.</p><p>Jaehyun shakes his fur out and huffs at Johnny as if to say that he’s ready. His fur seems brighter under the moonlight.</p><p>Johnny shifts and leads them into the forest.</p><p>The forest is always different at night. It takes on an almost magical quality, and the full moon amplifies the feeling. The light is brighter, making the shadows seem darker.</p><p>Other animals know that it’s the full moon too, so it isn’t just the wolves running through the forest too. There are moose, opossums, and cougars silently celebrating the moon alongside the wolves.</p><p>Once he can sense that Jaehyun is more comfortable, Johnny starts the actual run part. He bounds forward, trusting that Jaehyun will be behind him.</p><p>He doesn’t count on Jaehyun being faster than him, his smaller frame not slowing him like Johnny’s size. </p><p>They race over boulders and fallen logs, passing the clearing that they’d seen the owl in.</p><p>Jaehyun stops first, chest heaving with exertion. He approaches Johnny and bounces backwards on his haunches. He’s inviting Johnny to play with him. Johnny lurches forward, playing with Jaehyun. They chase each other for a few minutes until Jaehyun rolls over onto his stomach, tail wagging against the soil. He’s submitting to Johnny. </p><p>Johnny’s control of his instincts is weaker during the full moon. He lets himself nip at Jaehyun, alpha to omega. Jaehyun makes a happy noise and licks at Johnny’s face.</p><p>They race back to the house, muscles straining and hearts pounding.</p><p>“How was that?” Johnny asks, still panting once they’ve shifted back.</p><p>Jaehyun’s eyes are bright. He reeks of unbridled happiness.</p><p>“That was really fun.” He says, and a smile spreads across his face. “Really. I see what you mean about the shift being easier. Now that I want it, the moon makes it simple.”</p><p>“I’m glad.” </p><p>“And it was fun to finally play with you,” Jaehyun adds, almost shyly. </p><p>Johnny just smiles.</p><p>Back in the house the rest of the pack is asleep. Taeil and Donghyuck are curled up around each other as wolves on the living room floor. Jaehyun stares.</p><p>“Donghyuck likes him,” Jaehyun whispers. </p><p>“You don’t need to whisper,” Johnny says with a laugh. “It isn’t a secret.” </p><p>“They look comfy,” Jaehyun says, almost wistfully. </p><p>“They are. Mate bonds are stronger on the full moon.”</p><p>“Are they mates?”</p><p>“Not yet. But they will be,” Johnny answers. </p><p>They creep upstairs. Johnny can see Mark and Jungwoo sharing a bed, and Yuta, Doyoung, and Taeyong sharing another.</p><p>“Goodnight Jaehyun,” Johnny says softly once they’ve reached their rooms. “Thank you for coming running with me.”</p><p>“Goodnight Johnny. You’re welcome,” Jaehyun whispers back. </p><p>Johnny doesn’t remember having this much fun on a full moon run since he was a pup.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The first pack member to approach him is Taeil, early the next morning before anybody else has woken up.</p><p>“You’re an alpha. The pack expects you there during full moon runs,” Taeil says tensely.</p><p>“I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”</p><p>“Did you forget? That doesn’t seem like you,” Taeil says, his brow furrowed.</p><p>“No I… Jaehyun had never been on a moon run with another wolf before. He can’t run with the pack obviously but I wanted him to experience what it’s like to run with someone else,” Johnny answers.</p><p>“That’s a pretty omega you have,” he says gently. </p><p>“I don’t have him,” Johnny says. </p><p>“You correct me on that but you don’t tell me that he isn’t pretty.” </p><p>“You have working eyes,” Johnny replies. “He’s pretty.” </p><p>“How’d you find him?” Taeil asks. Johnny explains how Jaehyun got turned, and ended up in Fern Grove. </p><p>“So, yeah,” Johnny finishes. </p><p>Taeil whistles. </p><p>“So that’s why you took him running? Not because you like him.” </p><p>“I don’t. Well of course I like him as a friend but not like that. I wouldn’t dare break his trust like that because he trusts me to teach him how to be a wolf and I’m not-” Johnny starts to ramble. Taeil rests a hand on Johnny’s shoulder, silencing him. </p><p>“It’s okay Johnny,” Taeil says reassuringly. “Our wolves like who they like. It isn’t the end of the world if you like him.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun is cooking chili and cornbread for the pack dinner the next weekend when Jungwoo sidles up beside Johnny.   </p><p>"He's pretty good-looking," Jungwoo muses. "Tall. Handsome. You'd think he was an alpha if you didn't smell him. I'd swoop him up if you weren't all goo-goo eyed." </p><p>"He's a good person," Johnny replies. "That's what matters."</p><p>Jungwoo's expression shifts. </p><p>"You really like him," he says. Johnny doesn't say anything. He doesn't need to. Jungwoo bumps his shoulder to Johnny's. "He's good for you."</p><p>“I think so too,” Johnny says back. </p><p>“Wait! I’m going to come up with the best plan to get you two together,” Jungwoo says conspiratorially. “Don’t worry, leave it all to me.”</p><p>“That’s exactly what I’m afraid of,” Johnny says. “You’re hardly a casanova.” </p><p>Jungwoo scoffs. </p><p>“I’ll have you know that I had a large hand in Donghyuck and Taeil getting together.” </p><p>“You did not,” Johnny says, narrowing his eyes at Jungwoo. </p><p>“Okay. Maybe a small part,” Jungwoo says. “But you know I love watching dramas.”</p><p>“That doesn’t make you an expert.” </p><p>“Yes it does! Okay, and I can ask Doyoung too.” </p><p>“That’s even worse,” Johnny says. </p><p>Jaehyun turns and laughs at something Taeyong says. Johnny admires him. Jaehyun really is attractive, and seeing him here in Johnny’s kitchen cooking for Johnny’s pack makes him far happier than he might’ve thought. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>One day between classes, Johnny sees a gaggle of first years laughing so loudly that a flock of birds flies off. He thinks about all the first years having parties and studying together on campus. Jaehyun hasn’t done any of that -- he’s either in class on campus, or studying and hanging out at Johnny’s house. It’s almost the end of November and Johnny has been hogging Jaehyun’s time.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“Am I taking you away from regular university life?” Johnny asks Jaehyun that night. Jaehyun blinks at him.</p><p>“No, why?”</p><p>“Well it’s just… You don’t go to parties or study with other first years and maybe you’re missing out on that campus life. And I know that you wanted to have a normal life.”</p><p>“Johnny,” Jaehyun says patiently.  “I like spending time here with the pack. With you.”</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>“Yeah. This is my normal now. I’m a wolf whether I like it or not, and I’ve found such great friends with you and your pack. I’m happy here,” Jaehyun says, gesturing to Johnny’s living room. </p><p>“I’m glad,” Johnny says, his heart swelling with happiness. “We’re always happy to have you over.”</p><p>“So thank you for asking, I guess. But don’t worry, I’m happy,” Jaehyun says brightly. And it’s true -- if Johnny pauses to look at Jaehyun he seems a lot happier. There’s a fullness in his cheeks, and a glint in his eyes that wasn’t there when Johnny met him again at the start of the semester. And even if Jaehyun’s happiness is his own, just knowing that Johnny had a part in that makes him feel good.  </p><p>“Just checking in,” Johnny says, smiling at Jaehyun. Jaehyun smiles back.  </p><p>“Actually, and Johnny?” </p><p>“Yeah?” </p><p>“I think I’m going to tell my parents that I’m a wolf,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“That’s awesome,” Johnny replies with a smile. He reaches out to squeeze Jaehyun’s shoulder. </p><p>“I’m just wondering… Could you be there while I do it?” </p><p>“Of course,” Johnny answers immediately. “I’ll be there.”</p><p>“I don’t know when… But I want to.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“The pack is having a party this weekend. You should come,” Johnny says. Jungwoo had threatened Johnny to get Jaehyun come, but Johnny doesn’t tell Jaehyun that.</p><p>“Sure,” Jaehyun answers right away. “Should I call an Uber or something to get home after?” </p><p>“You’re always welcome to stay over here,” Johnny says. “I have lots of spare rooms and the yellow room is basically already yours. Also I don’t think Uber drives out here.”</p><p>“Are you sure?”</p><p>“What’s one more person hmm?” Johnny jokes. “My house is practically a hotel already.”</p><p>“Thanks Johnny,” Jaehyun says, his cheeks flushing red.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny drives Jaehyun home with him and a duffel bag on Friday afternoon. When they get there, Jungwoo and Doyoung are sitting on the porch drinking beers. They wave enthusiastically to Jaehyun. </p><p>“It would be nice to have a pack like this,” Jaehyun says. “You always have people around who care about you</p><p>“Less fun when they’re always barging in and you don’t have any privacy,” Johnny grumbles.</p><p>“I hope… Maybe someday I’ll have a pack,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“I know you will,” Johnny replies, his throat tight. “Any pack would be happy to have you.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>After dinner Johnny loses track of Jaehyun. He’d been tugged away by Yuta, but that was an hour ago and now Johnny is getting concerned. </p><p>"Have you seen Jaehyun?" Johnny asks Mark, who’s playing Nintendo Switch with Taeyong. </p><p>"Last I saw he was taking shots with Doyoung," Mark says, and he and Johnny grimace simultaneously. </p><p>"Oh no," Johnny says. </p><p>"You should probably go rescue him."</p><p>When Johnny finds him, Jaehyun is leaning heavily against Doyoung. Johnny walks a little faster towards them. </p><p>Jaehyun visibly perks up when he sees Johnny. </p><p>"Johnny!" Jaehyun chirps. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes seem a little too bright. </p><p>"Here he is Daddy," Doyoung says, and shoves a pliant Jaehyun into Johnny's arms. </p><p>"Don't call me that," Johnny grumbles. </p><p>"Daddy?" Jaehyun says, flopping his head onto Johnny's shoulder. Johnny feels unsettlingly aroused by it. Doyoung is cackling. </p><p>"Don't listen to Doyoung," Johnny says. "Come on, let's get you to bed."</p><p>"Are you coming with?" Jaehyun asks. </p><p>"If you ask him nicely," Doyoung answers and Johnny glares. </p><p>"I'm going to my bed," Johnny says gently. </p><p>"No!" Jaehyun protests. One of his legs twists weirdly. "Ow!"</p><p>"Looks like you need to carry him," Doyoung says. </p><p>"You have a death wish," Johnny replies, narrowing his eyes at Doyoung. </p><p>"You can carry me if you want," Jaehyun slurs. "You're big and strong." </p><p>"Mmm. Big and strong," Doyoung says gleefully. Johnny makes a threatening hand motion and then he hoists Jaehyun into his arms. Jaehyun wraps his arms around Johnny's neck. </p><p>He carefully carries Jaehyun upstairs to the room that’s quickly become Jaehyun’s. </p><p>"Hey Johnny?" Jaehyun asks, slurring his words together slightly. </p><p>"Yeah?" </p><p>"I think that you're really pretty," Jaehyun says and Johnny laughs. </p><p>"You're really drunk," he says with a smile, smoothing down Jaehyun's bangs. </p><p>"I'm not," Jaehyun protests, blinking his eyes slowly. "Why are there three of you? Is this a dream?" </p><p>"Good night big guy," Johnny says. </p><p>"I'm not big!" Jaehyun protests. "I'm small. Tiny. You're big."</p><p>Something hot coils in Johnny's chest. </p><p>"Goodnight little one," Johnny says. He means it to be a joke. It is a joke. There's nothing small about Jaehyun. But Jaehyun beams at him, his eyes scrunched shut and his dimples out in full display. And Johnny realizes that it isn't a joke. </p><p>"Goodnight," Jaehyun says happily. </p><p>Johnny forcibly reminds himself that Jaehyun is drunk and he doesn’t mean anything that he’s saying. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny wakes up to the sound of wretching. He pokes his head in the bathroom to see Jaehyun crouched beside the toilet. </p><p>“Are you okay?” he asks. </p><p>"Ugh," Jaehyun groans. "My head hurts like a motherfucker."</p><p>"You shouldn't have let Doyoung give you drinks," Johnny replies sympathetically. "That was your first mistake." </p><p>"Do you even remember what happened last night?" Johnny asks carefully. Jaehyun pauses for a moment. </p><p>"I don't remember anything past Doyoung pouring me a drink," he says. </p><p>"Mmm," Johnny says. He doesn't know whether to be grateful or disappointed. </p><p>“I vaguely remember talking to you.”</p><p>“We did talk,” Johnny says with a laugh. </p><p>“Oh no,” Jaehyun, his face falling. “Did I say something embarrassing?”</p><p>“No more than usual,” Johnny teases. Jaehyun rolls his eyes. </p><p>“I’m too hungover for you to tease me. I need cuddles before I can be teased,” Jaehyun grumbles. </p><p>“Maybe later,” Johnny teases. “If you ask me nicely.”</p><p>Jaehyun answers by throwing up again. Johnny pats him on the back. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Donghyuck and Mark decide to have a campfire that evening, and Johnny coaxes Jaehyun from his studying to roast marshmallows with them. </p><p>The smoke of the fire curls upwards and the stars seem extra bright. The night is cold but Jaehyun’s body is warm beside him. </p><p>Jaehyun’s marshmallows keep lighting on fire which sets them off into giggles. Jaehyun smells like cold air and campfire on top of his regular scent</p><p>Best of all, he smells happy. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny is just getting ready for bed that night when he hears a knock on the door. </p><p>“Yes?” he calls out. </p><p>“Johnny?” he hears, and sees Jaehyun hovering in the doorway.</p><p>“Mhmm?”</p><p>“Mark and Taeyong are sleeping on my bed,”</p><p>Johnny takes mental inventory. The sofa is full and the other two bedrooms are full. The only empty space is Johnny’s room.</p><p>“You can sleep here if you want,” Johnny says quietly.</p><p>“Are you sure?”</p><p>“I’m not going to make you sleep on the floor Jaehyun,” Johnny says with a laugh. “Come here.”</p><p>Jaehyun settles on the edge of the mattress. He seems tense.</p><p>“I don’t snore, I promise,” Johnny jokes, and then yanks Jaehyun further onto the mattress.</p><p>Jaehyun lies stiffly for a few moments before relaxing.</p><p>“Goodnight,” Jaehyun says.</p><p>“Goodnight,” Johnny says back. “Sleep well.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny wakes up the next morning curled around Jaehyun. He feels more refreshed and rested than he has in ages, and he has a feeling that has something to do with the cuddly Jaehyun in his arms.</p><p>His instincts are humming happily -- his pack is in his house, and his person is in his arms. There’s nothing a pack alpha wants more.</p><p>Jaehyun makes a soft snuffling noise and then blinks his eyes open. </p><p>“Good morning,” Johnny says softly. </p><p>“Good morning,” Jaehyun says back. </p><p>Johnny can’t help but wonder what it would be like if he woke up to this every day -- Jaehyun here with the rest of his pack.</p><p>There’s a thrum under Johnny’s skin</p><p>His wolf is going crazy. Jaehyun is pack. He’s Johnny’s.</p><p>Jaehyun just doesn’t know it yet.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The first big snowstorm of the year hits on a Sunday in the middle of November. Johnny is enjoying a rare day to himself in the house.</p><p>And then Jaehyun arrives on Johnny’s porch in his wolf form with a yip as the wind howls.</p><p>"Did you come here all the way from campus?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun nods. “Hold on, let me go find you some clothes.”</p><p>He grabs some boxers, sweatpants, a hoodie, and socks and rushes back to the porch. </p><p>“What are you doing here?” he asks as Jaehyun shifts and dresses.</p><p>“I got bored,” Jaehyun says. “My professors cancelled class tomorrow but I already did all my homework when we were at the coffee shop on Friday. So I wanted to hang out with you.”</p><p>“You could’ve just called and asked me to pick you up.”</p><p>“The roads are really bad. They haven’t even started clearing them.”</p><p>Jaehyun is probably right, Johnny realizes.</p><p>“You’re ridiculous,” he replies with a sigh. Jaehyun just sends him a cheeky smile.</p><p>The fire is already going in the fireplace and Johnny makes them each a steaming mug of hot cocoa as he starts dinner. He was already going to make chicken cacciatore for himself, so making a serving for Jaehyun too isn’t that much extra work.</p><p>Jaehyun is uncharacteristically quiet. He helps Johnny chop onions and olives, but he seems to be thinking about something.</p><p>They settle into the sofa for the night, fiddling with Netflix until Jaehyun finds something he wants to watch.</p><p>Johnny lifts his arm to rest on the back of the sofa, aware of the proximity between him and Jaehyun. Jaehyun doesn’t hesitate, he just leans right into Johnny. It wouldn’t be strange for packmates but it is a little strange for two wolves who are neither packmates or mates.</p><p>“Is everything okay?” Johnny asks Jaehyun. “You’re quiet tonight.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Jaehyun answers, snuggling further into Johnny. “Just thinking about some stuff.”</p><p>“Mmm.”</p><p>“You aren’t going to ask me?”</p><p>“I know that you know that you can tell me if you want to, but I won’t force you to tell me anything,” Johnny answers. </p><p>“Thank you,” Jaehyun whispers.</p><p>Johnny thinks that there are worse ways to spend a snowy evening.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun smells stronger than usual one afternoon a few days after the snowstorm. Much stronger than usual. He’s in heat, Johnny realizes.</p><p>“Is everything okay?” he asks carefully. They’re sitting on the sofa, watching Yuta and Donghyuck play video games.</p><p>“Yeah, just feeling a bit off,” Jaehyun answers. He moves closer to Johnny.</p><p>“Okay, let me know if you need to get home or anything.”</p><p>“I’m good here,” Jaehyun says, wrapping his arms around Johnny’s torso. “Feels better already.”</p><p>Johnny’s cheeks feel as if they’re on fire.</p><p>“Good,” he says, allowing himself to wrap his arms around Jaehyun back. </p><p>“I’m tired Johnny,” Jaehyun slurs. </p><p>“Then go to sleep pup,” he says, stroking Jaehyun’s arm.</p><p>“I feel weird.”</p><p>“I know,” Johnny says.</p><p>“You make me feel better though,” Jaehyun replies quietly. Johnny’s heart aches a little bit.</p><p>“I’m glad,” he forces himself to say. Donghyuck turns from looking at the TV to send them a disgusted look.</p><p>They spend the rest of the afternoon cuddled up tightly together. He doesn’t miss the way that the rest of the pack give the two of them a wide berth.</p><p>“Can I go to bed?” Jaehyun asks just past eight, rubbing his eyes. “I feel weird.”</p><p>“Of course. I’ll help you upstairs,” Johnny says. There’s no way he can drive Jaehyun home like this, and he wouldn’t ask Yuta or Taeyong to sit in a car with Jaehyun in heat. </p><p>“I want to sleep in your bed,” Jaehyun says. “You smell so good. I want to lick you.” </p><p>Johnny’s heart does some kind of tap dance but he helps Jaehyun stand up, and then all but lifts him into his arms. Jaehyun paws at Johnny’s chest.</p><p>“So broad,” Jaehyun says. “Feels good.”</p><p>Jaehyun’s hands squeeze Johnny’s biceps. </p><p>“So strong.”</p><p>Johnny moves Jaehyun’s hands off. </p><p>“You’re okay,” he murmurs. </p><p>“You make me feel good,” Jaehyun says. “Thank you Johnny.”</p><p>“You make me feel good too,” Johnny replies. </p><p>He looks down. Jaehyun is fast asleep. Johnny doesn’t stop himself — he kisses Jaehyun’s warm forehead and tucks him into bed.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>The next morning Jaehyun is back to normal. Johnny would be relieved if he wasn’t so disappointed to not have Jaehyun cuddling up to him any more. </p><p>He needs to accept the facts -- he’s attracted to Jaehyun. Worse, he likes Jaehyun, like really likes Jaehyun. But Jaehyun is painfully straight. He’s never mentioned anybody but the girl he was seeing at the start of the semester, and Johnny has no chance. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“I’m gonna call my parents today,” Jaehyun says to Johnny the next week as they’re studying in the Classics library.</p><p>“And tell them?” Johnny asks. Jaehyun nods. “Take a deep breath,” Johnny reminds him. “You got this!”</p><p>Jaehyun calls his parents and Johnny takes Jaehyun’s hand.</p><p>He listens as Jaehyun and his parents talk about Clarendon, Jaehyun’s debit balance, his new friends (Johnny feels a swell of warmth in his chest at that), and the weather in southern BC compared to Fern Grove.</p><p>They don’t talk about Jaehyun being a wolf.</p><p>“I chickened out,” Jaehyun says sheepishly after he hangs up.</p><p>“That’s okay,” Johnny replies. “You were really brave to try.”</p><p>“You think so?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Johnny says and squeezes Jaehyun’s hand. “Oh, and I think I still have some pie leftover at home if you want to come over and eat some?” Johnny says and Jaehyun grins.</p><p>“You’re the best.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“I don’t think I’m going home for Christmas,” Jaehyun tells Johnny as November comes to an end. “I just… I don’t know if I can be around my parents right now. I feel like I’m keeping such a big secret.”</p><p>“You’re welcome to stay here if you’re going to be in Fern Grove,” Johnny says. “We’d all be happy to have you.”</p><p>“Really?” </p><p>“Mhmm.”</p><p>“That sounds really nice,” Jaehyun says. “Are you sure I’m not intruding on pack time?”</p><p>“Not at all,” Johnny answers. </p><p>Because time with Jaehyun feels like pack time.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny makes a stop in Fern Grove that night before he heads home. He goes to a locksmith and orders another key made for his house.</p><p>He asks the pack that night how they’d feel if he asked Jaehyun to join. </p><p>“Yes!” Doyoung screeches. </p><p>"He’s cool,” Yuta says. </p><p>“Someone else to bother!” Donghyuck chirps. </p><p>“You already bother him though?” Mark says. </p><p>“We’d be happy if Jaehyun joined,” Taeyong says warmly. Jungwoo looks as if he’s fending off tears. </p><p>Johnny takes it to be a yes. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>He’s driving Jaehyun home that Sunday when Jaehyun speaks.</p><p>“Jungwoo told me that alphas like omegas the most,” Jaehyun says. Johnny raises an eyebrow.</p><p>“I don’t know if that’s true.” Johnny says. “Status isn’t nearly as important as the person. Taeil likes Donghyuck for some reason so it doesn’t really matter.”</p><p>“What about you though?” Jaehyun presses.</p><p>“Me? I don’t care about status,” Johnny says. Inexplicably, disappointment flickers across Jaehyun’s face.</p><p>“Jungwoo said that you like an omega right now,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“I guess I do,” Johnny says. “But more than anything they’re my friend.”</p><p>“But you like them?” </p><p>“Yeah,” Johnny says, turning to look right at Jaehyun. “I really do.” </p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t respond. </p><p>“Thanks for the ride,” he tells Johnny, and slams the door shut with more force than usual. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>“What were you telling Jaehyun about alphas and omegas?” Johnny asks Jungwoo once he’s come back home from dropping Jaehyun off. Jungwoo grins.</p><p>“I’m just helping you out.”</p><p>"You're being a pain in my ass," Johnny grumbles.</p><p>"More like you want to be the pain in Jaehyun's-" Jungwoo's sentence is cut off by Johnny throwing a pillow at him.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun pulls away from Johnny after that conversation about Johnny liking an omega. Johnny tells himself that it’s the end of the semester, of course Jaehyun is busy. </p><p>But after Jaehyun has ducked out of Johnny’s invites for a week and a half, he starts reflecting on all of their interactions.</p><p>Johnny can't think of anything that's happened between them except that weird conversation with Jungwoo. There must have been something in that conversation that made Jaehyun feel uncomfortable. </p><p>He doesn’t want this tension to continue between him and Jaehyun. He wants his friend back. </p><p>He waits outside Jaehyun’s Greek History classroom just before the class finishes. Jaehyun sees Johnny, and looks away, as if looking for a way to escape. Johnny jogs toward him.  Jaehyun seems even more handsome than usual, even though Johnny knows that he just looks the same. He’s just a sucker for Jaehyun.</p><p>“Hey, can we talk for a minute?” he asks. Jaehyun bites his lip. </p><p>“Yeah, okay. But it has to be quick, I have to go do something after this,” he answers quietly. Jaehyun looks nervous</p><p>“I feel like we’ve been off lately,” Johnny says. “And I wanted to apologize if I did something to make you uncomfortable.” </p><p>“No. You’re all good,” Jaehyun replies. His scent sours. Johnny feels himself wilt. It feels like a strange repeat of the beginning of the school year. </p><p>“I’m not good,” Johnny says. “Please, tell me what’s going on.”</p><p>“It’s not you, it’s all me.”</p><p>“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable,”</p><p>"I just... it's fine. I’m fine.” Jaehyun says meekly. “I’ve gotta go to office hours, I’ll see you later Johnny.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny hardly sees Jaehyun during finals. He figures that Jaehyun is busy studying, it’s his first semester of university after all</p><p>And then winter break begins. Taeil comes back from university in Toronto. Taeyong and Yuta pick Jaehyun up from school and move him into the yellow bedroom. </p><p>Days are spent running through the snowy forest, watching Christmas movies, and napping in front of the fire. Every night the pack eats dinner together, and then plays video games until it’s time for bed. </p><p>It would be perfect if Jaehyun weren’t so obviously ignoring Johnny. There’s always pack members around for Jaehyun to cling to. Each night Johnny stares at Jaehyun’s closed door, and contemplates knocking on the door. </p><p>He misses Jaehyun but Jaehyun is right there, which makes the whole thing even worse. </p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny doesn’t realize that they’re alone on Christmas Eve until it’s too late -- everyone else must’ve left during the superhero movie they were all watching. It’s the first time he’s been alone with Jaehyun all winter break. </p><p>Jaehyun must realize that they’re alone at the same time that Johnny does, because he practically leaps off the sofa. They’re sitting together in front of the fireplace, the fire crackling merrily. It would be awfully romantic if it wasn’t so awkward.  </p><p>“I think I’m going to go to bed,” Jaehyun says, staring at the ground. He smells unhappy, maybe the worst that Johnny has ever smelled on him.  </p><p>“Jaehyun, wait,” Johnny says. Jaehyun stops. </p><p>“What?” Jaehyun asks softly. </p><p>“I just… What have I done to upset you?”</p><p>“You haven’t done anything,” Jaehyun says. “You’re… you’re perfect.” </p><p>“I’m not. And I’ve done something to hurt you. Please tell me what it is. I never want to hurt you.”</p><p>“Just don’t make me think things that aren’t true,” Jaehyun whispers. </p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“Don’t make me think that you like me when you don’t,” Jaehyun says, and starts walking out of the room. </p><p>Johnny grabs his arm. His instincts are alight at the contact between the two of them.  </p><p>“What are you talking about Jaehyun? I’ve made you think that? But I like you.”</p><p>“I don’t understand,” Jaehyun says, blinking at Johnny. </p><p>“I like you.”</p><p>"But you only like omegas!" Jaehyun bursts out.</p><p>“You’re an omega Jaehyun,” Johnny says.</p><p>“What? No I’m not.”</p><p>“Jaehyun. You’re kidding,” Johnny says. Jaehyun’s expression doesn’t change. Some things start flashing through Johnny’s mind. Jaehyun’s weirdness in heat. His disappointment when Johnny told him that he liked an omega.</p><p>“Oh my god. You don’t know that you’re an omega.”</p><p>“I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m just a beta.”</p><p>“No you’re not?” Johnny says. “You’re one hundred percent an omega.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You didn’t know that you’re an omega?”</p><p>“No,” Jaehyun says. “It’s not like anybody told me!” Johnny groans.</p><p>“I’ve been so stupid. I shouldn’t have assumed.”</p><p>“So all those times Jungwoo was telling me that you liked an omega… And then when you told me you liked an omega?” </p><p>“When I told you I was interested in one omega I was talking about you!” Johnny says.</p><p>“You were?” Jaehyun asks. He looks completely surprised. Johnny groans for the thousandth time. </p><p>“I thought you knew that you were an omega. I was trying to confess to you.”</p><p>“Oh,” Jaehyun says, his cheeks turning pink. “Oh.”</p><p>“Yes oh!” Johnny says. </p><p>“So Jungwoo was telling me that you like me?” </p><p>“Yes.” </p><p>“That’s good then,” Jaehyun says, biting his lip. "Because I really really like you." </p><p>Johnny feels like his face is going to split in half with the force of his smile. </p><p>“You do?” he asks softly. Jaehyun nods. </p><p>"Can I kiss you?" Johnny asks. </p><p>“Yes,” Jaehyun answers. Johnny steps in close, and Jaehyun looks up at him. His eyes are soft. "Hey," he says.</p><p>"Hey you," Johnny says back with a smile. He puts one hand on Jaehyun's lower back, and one hand on Jaehyun's narrow hip. </p><p>Their lips meet softly. Johnny’s nerves alight with sensation. Jaehyun’s lips are soft and he smells like joy and warmth. It feels like time slows down. </p><p>Jaehyun sighs into the kiss and Johnny feels his instincts preen.</p><p>He pulls away from the kiss first, and Jaehyun leans his head against Johnny’s chest.  </p><p>"I think I like you even more now," Jaehyun says. "I didn't even know that was possible." </p><p>“I know what you mean,” Johnny says, kissing the top of Jaehyun’s head. “God… I’m so sorry Jaehyun. I should’ve outright told you liked you.”</p><p>“It’s okay,” Jaehyun says. “We got there in the end.”</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Jaehyun follows him into his bedroom at the end of the night. </p><p>"I'm sleeping here tonight," Jaehyun says decisively. Something spikes in his scent, and it takes Johnny a moment to realize that it’s arousal. </p><p>"Okay," Johnny says, and reaches out to tug Jaehyun so he topples onto the bed with him. </p><p>"Johnny!" Jaehyun says with a giggle. </p><p>"Oops."</p><p>Jaehyun leans down and kisses Johnny again. His scent is so happy that Johnny can hardly believe it. The kiss deepens -- Jaehyun parting his lips, and Johnny slipping his tongue inside. </p><p>Jaehyun makes a keening noise and Johnny chases it. Jaehyun’s hands wander over Johnny’s chest, and Johnny gropes Jaehyun’s ass.</p><p>Eventually they pull apart to get changed for bed.</p><p>Jaehyun strips his shirt off, and Johnny lets his gaze lingers on Jaehyun's abs. </p><p>"Did you know that even the girls in my grade thought you were hot?" Johnny asks. </p><p>"Did they?" Jaehyun asks, cocking his head to the side. "Hmm. And what did you think of me?" </p><p>"I thought you were pretty I suppose," Johnny says, propping himself up on his elbows to properly admire Jaehyun. "But now I think that you're gorgeous." </p><p>“The girls in my grade thought you were handsome,” Jaehyun says, coming over to lie on the bed beside Johnny. </p><p>“Of course I am,” Johnny says, and gestures dramatically towards himself.</p><p>"I need to tell you something. I’ve never... done anything with a guy before," Jaehyun says. </p><p>"That's okay," Johnny replies. "You don't need to do anything. We can just kiss." </p><p>"Is that okay?"</p><p>"Of course that's okay," Johnny answers, and presses a quick kiss on Jaehyun's cheek, right above his dimple. “We’ll go at whatever pace you want.”</p><p>“Can you kiss me again?” Jaehyun whispers.</p><p>And Johnny does.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Johnny wakes up on Christmas morning to find the snow falling gently outside and Jaehyun warm against him.</p><p>He smiles and squeezes his arms around Jaehyun. </p><p>“Good morning,” Jaehyun says, blinking adorably at him. </p><p>“Good morning,” Johnny says back. </p><p>"I like waking up beside you," Jaehyun says. “I’ve liked it since the first time it happened.”</p><p>"I like it too," Johnny replies, and kisses the tip of Jaehyun's nose. </p><p>Jaehyun smiles, his nose scrunching up.</p><p>“Merry Christmas Johnny,” Jaehyun says. </p><p>“Merry Christmas pup.”</p><p>“Don’t call me that,” Jaehyun practically pouts. </p><p>“But you are one,” Johnny says. </p><p>All of a sudden Jaehyun rolls on top of Johnny, straddling his hips. </p><p>“I’ll show you who the pup is,” Jaehyun practically growls, and leans down to kiss Johnny messily. </p><p>They don’t get out of bed for another hour.</p><p>☾*✲⋆.</p><p>Christmas morning is slow and lazy. Johnny doesn’t understand how, but somehow the rest of the pack is quiet -- he can hear howls from the forest that sound suspiciously like Donghyuck but he and Jaehyun have the house to themselves. </p><p>Johnny makes them eggs and bacon for breakfast (and almost burns the bacon when Jaehyun won’t stop kissing him). </p><p>Jaehyun reaches his hand out for Johnny to take after breakfast and leads them into the living room. His hand is warm from holding his mug of coffee. Johnny tugs him in for another kiss. He doesn’t think he’ll ever grow tired of kissing Jaehyun. </p><p>They settle down on the sofa — Jaehyun practically on Johnny’s lap.</p><p>“So, I have a gift for you,” Johnny says.</p><p>“You didn’t need to get me anything,” Jaehyun replies, but his cheeks are turning red. </p><p>Johnny pulls the key from his sweatpant pocket and presses it into Jaehyun’s hand.</p><p>“What’s this?” Jaehyun asks, staring down at the key in his palm. </p><p>“This is a key to the house,” Johnny says. “On behalf of the pack I want to offer you an invitation to join the pack. They’d love to have you.”</p><p>“And you?” Jaehyun asks softly. “Do you want that?”</p><p>“I’d be so happy. So happy,” Johnny answers. </p><p>Jaehyun grins. </p><p>“I want to join your pack,” Jaehyun says. “So, so much.”</p><p>“Then you’re in,” Johnny says. “Welcome home pup.”</p>
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